There are a few important points to be made here.
Accuracy
Spectral methods exhibit, appropriately, spectral (super-algebraic) convergence. As a result, much smaller matrix sizes are required to produce the same accuracy as a FEM or FDM. Of course, the specific size and relative advantages depend on the specific scheme chosen and stability and resolution desired. An excellent example of this is shown below (S.W. Armeld et al. JCAM, 2009), where the eigenspectra of the Orr-Sommerfeld operator is computed and accuracy compared between a standard FDM and various spectral discretizations.
Indeed this is a principal example of how spectral methods became ubiquitous in computation science, illustrated first by the hallmark paper Orszag JFM, 1971.

Matrix structure and solve
As you rightly point out, spectral methods yield dense and typically unstructured difference matrices. The expense of computing the eigensystem or a linear solve of such a matrix is no doubt more expensive than a symmetric, sparse system from a FDM scheme, were they both the same size. The exact expense, again, depends on the specific scheme and solution method. Methods for solving both such matrix systems are extensively studied and well documented in the literature.
Conditioning
This is a subtle but very important point. Spectral methods are typically horribly conditioned. Specifically, polynomial methods have condition number
$$\kappa \equiv \frac{\sigma_{max}}{\sigma_{min}} = \mathcal{O}(N^{2p})$$
where $p$ is the order of the highest derivative and $N$ is the number of
collocation points. Accurately evaluating solutions to poorly conditioned matrices requires care and sometimes extended precision, making such operations more costly. This also places a limit on the accuracy you are able to obtain for a given precision (conveniently you can see this behavior in the above figure, also).
Interestingly, the above expression for $\kappa$ has yielded methods designed to split operators such that you have two coupled order $p/2$ equations, as opposed to a single order $p$ equation. There are other specialty methods to finagle your problem to be less computationally horrible, though I won't document them all here.